Monday, October 17, 2011

why

now i hab gotten wht i wanted..
but y do i feel so unhappy??
is it because i succeded in separating two frens from each other??
since when did i become so evil n ruthless??
wht did i do???
i was tired of crying..
i was tired of questioning myself every day n nite
when they were close.. i felt like i was always in the middle..
i felt as though they shared a special bond betwenn them..
i felt as though she was taking him away from mi

n now i hab succeded in separating them.. n gotten wht i wanted..
but y do i feel as though m the reason for his unhappiness??
y do i feel tht he's jus accepting this separation jus for my sake??
it's like he doesn't love mi but he jus feels sorry for mi..
he's jus doing this to make mi happy..
but wht abt his happiness??
all those past memories are unforgettable..
we were so cute..
his actions was so cute...
his tries to get my attention was jus...
but after he met her.. it's like he wasn't happi wid mi anymore..
like as though his happiness didn't lie wid being wid mi..
his happiness was in seeing his best fren happi..
his happiness was in seeing his best fren smile...
his happiness was in providing his best fren a helping hand..

i felt as though he was fading away ..
he's like a small child who seems to b attracted to whoever he meets..
he's still like a kid who believes in others' crocodile tears..

in tht case wht could i do ??
my own love was going away from mi .
he was tryna change mi ..
make mi like his best fren..
wht could i do after all than to separate both of them
but now// \
now i feel as though m the evil one here.. WHY GOD WHYYY ??
I WANT TO B BACK TO NORMAL.. I WANT TO B THT SAME OLD GIRL who was happy go lucky..
whoa was never insecure.. who never had to worry about being left alone.. but who used to help others n give advice to others..
since when did i become so helpless n alone=??
wht exactly is this feeling godd..
i wud rather die than to hab this feeling.. pls pls pls pls help mi...

i dun wan to snatch another person's happiness jus to make myself happi...
pls god.. i want him to tell mi if he's unhappy wid all these..
i want him to b honest wif mi if he feels restricted...
i want him to tell mi honeslty if my scoldings to him isn't unacceptable..
because it will at least give mi a good feeling..
it will at least tell mi tht m doing right n not wrong..
pls god pls..
i realli dun wan to snatch other people's happiness
my happiness is in his happiness.. pls
god help me.. show mi a way '